Take the Family Photo!
As a high school counselor, it breaks my heart when a student is sitting in my office and they lost their parent. The ticking of silence begins as there are no words that can remove the pain and no assurances that definitively prove to them that everything will be okay. I have been blessed to have both of my parents alive but not everyone shares that joy. When we are stricken with pain, it is common to look at photos of loved ones. It is common to look at photos to remember warm memories, to draw connections, and find strength.
While Mommy University presented tips on successful photos, it is important to understand that photos are important. For all the posed photos of their dance recitals, birthday parties, and school photos, it is the unique and informal photos that will surprisingly give you a giggle and recollection of another time. Sadly, as moms we often times forget to include ourselves in photos. I dare you to review the last 100 photos you have taken and see how many include you in them. Here’s the thing: if something was to happen to you, your children will look for photos of you to give them comfort. This is why I recently became a strong believer in the family photo.
I am not photogenic; my hair is always messy and somehow whenever I am perfectly dressed I will spill coffee on myself (or rip my clothes or my child will rub dirt on me), and I have a huge gap in my teeth. I am not slamming myself, this is me. This has been me before I had children. I would typically shy away from the side of the camera lens that wasn’t pressing the button. I volunteered, and still do, to take everyone’s photos and avoid group selfies. I am learning to get over that.
The fall walk in Princeton was fun even though our daughter was learning how to walk (she took her first steps two weeks later).
Mommy University Presents
5 Reasons for the Family Photo
Sustain Memories
I don’t think we need to document every moment our child experiences which is ironic because I am known to take a lot of photographs. However, you should photograph some of the lesser grandeur family moments. If your family cherishes game nights, take some photos that night. Make sure you are in the photo as well. If ice cream parlor trips are a guilty family pleasure then bring a camera one day. There will always be those formal and posed photos at dances, sports, and organized events but those don’t make up all the warm memories that you share with your family. Taking photos of the activities your family most treasures tells a story which will be appreciated more easily by future generations.
A random photo after my son’s pirate birthday party. Shiver me timbers!
Establish a Connection
When my daughter was born we couldn’t determine who she resembled. The first week she was the spitting image of her brother and then swoosh we had no idea who she looked like until we found my grandmother’s baby album. I have never met my grandmother who passed away when I was a baby, but to have this preserved photo made a connection. When you look at photos of a family member performing an activity that you enjoy there is a bond between past and present which helps reinforce the family connection.
Encourages Laughter
When you look back at a photo, you may cringe at what you are wearing but you are most likely going to laugh. Your children may laugh when looking at the old family photos but then again you probably will as well. I still laugh at the fashion my parents wore and as a child of the 80’s I openly laugh at myself. Even when the photo is not intended to be funny, we find humor in the past. As well, it doesn’t hurt to take a silly photo.
My friends tell me that my daughter looks like me. I think it’s because we have a similar smile.
Find Strength
In moments of pain and struggle, we look for glimpses of hope. It is human nature to look back at our past and reflect on it. Photos do not replace loved ones that we lost but like hearing a voice or a familiar smell, they are linked to one of our five senses which recalls memories. When we look at a family photo there is always a story to be told. Photos enable us to recollect family narratives. There is a warmth in your body when you look at a photo of someone you love. Make sure to pass on that warmth to your children!
Preserve History
For the past four years, we have been taking family photos. The first year my daughter was three months old and I was terrified to have my photo taken. I felt exhausted, not myself, and well overall “blegh” sums it up. The last time my photo was taken professionally was at my wedding years (I mean years) before. Family is the most important thing. I want my children to have photos that show us as a family and each year to see our growth and maturity. Family portraits do not have to be stagnant. In fact, the most important factor is to show your family’s culture and personality. Last year, my son and my husband wore their Batman t-shirts. Each year, reflects a change in our family and its evolving history.
We try to have a unique quality reflected each year in our photographs. Our second year family photo, we all wore Converse sneakers.
Be courageous! Allow your photo to be taken by yourself and with your family.
All (professional) photos were taken by Kristina Britt Photography.